Let’s do a quick project together.
Step one: What makes you happy?
No, no. Don’t just answer. Really think it through. What makes you happy, and why? And to be clear, there are no right answers. It could be as simple or profound as you want.
Got it?
Step two: OK, are you in a spot where you can write? If you are, grab a piece of paper and a pencil or pen. Write down that thing you just thought of that makes you happy and why. (If you can’t write it down, then just speak it out loud.)
Here, I’ll go first. I’ll even write it on a Post-it note and say it so we’re all on the same level playing field.
Now, you can do what you want with your piece of paper, but I’m sticking mine to the bottom of my work PC monitor. I want to see it every day. I want to remind myself of this articulated truth in my life.
It’s the first verse of my own version of “These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things.” This kind of outlook is the focus of our ongoing Rogue Reads program this winter, informed by Ross Gay’s “The Book of Delights” essay collection.
The book’s preface comes with a few simple rules for this practice.
- Write one delight a day for a full year
- Write them quickly
- Write them by hand
Simple. If only modern board game rulebooks were so concise.
“It didn’t take me long to learn that the discipline or practice of writing these essays occasioned a kind of delight radar,” Gay reports. “Or maybe it was more like the development of a delight muscle. Something that implies that the more you study delight the more delight there is to study.”
Eagle Point library associate Sam Caredig noticed something similar when she led a journaling program called “Create Your Own Book of Delights.” Participants decorated a journal and began to fill the blank pages. We’ve got a few such classes left. A listing of ones for adults can be found here. There are also similar ones for teens, which you can peruse here.
“I think when you focus on the positive aspects, you begin to see more positive aspects of the world around you,” Sam says of the gratitude journaling practice. “I think that’s helpful, especially as you continue that process.”
Beyond the consideration and recording of what delighted them, Sam also noted an overall communal joy among program attendees.
“One of the patrons specifically, she was just kind of having a blech day, and came into the library to grab her books and saw that this program was going on, and just talked about how nice it is, not only to have library programming, but to have something where it’s just about community and putting that good into the world,” Sam says.
Journaling, as a basic practice, can come with its fair share of mental health benefits. There are a few methods you can adopt. A 2024 piece on Psychology Today includes everything from free form and guided journaling to a genre labeled as “one-sentence journaling” where you write one sentence per day that sums up your experience. Cliffs Notes journaling, if you will.
Unsurprisingly, gratitude journaling is on the list.
“This practice can shift your focus from negative to positive experiences, enhancing your overall mood and outlook,” the Psychology Today piece reads.
Sam says sharing these recorded bits of happiness with others takes it up another notch, something that unfolded during the program she headed up.
“It’s kind of contagious,” Sam says. “So you talk about something you’re excited about and then someone else gets excited about it, and suddenly you have a room full of joyful people.”
Let’s clarify something, though: reminding yourself of what makes you happy and recording it doesn’t cancel life’s difficulties. But they can co-exist.
“We need to be clear that anxiety and depression are not the result of you being ungrateful. Rather, gratitude is a tool to add to your arsenal to help you cope,” writes Dr. Ashley Smith for the Anxiety & Depression Association of America. “Gratitude doesn’t negate pain. It’s a ‘both and’ not an ‘either or’ practice. You can be both hurting AND grateful. You can use gratitude as a lifeline to keep you from drowning in the negative mental habits that intensify your pain but not to eliminate pain completely.”
I, for example, didn’t get much sleep last night because of a personal, gradually escalating conflict I’m dealing with. My stomach is all twisted up because of it, honestly. It’s also gray outside, foggy. The world just looks cold and wet and unwelcoming.
But guess what? Looking at this Post-it about my daughters makes it feel like there’s a lighter inside my chest, that someone just thumbed it on. It’s a small flame, not a massive bonfire, but enough for what I need right now; enough to spur some grateful baby steps.
Who knew a minute out of your day, some reflection, and small slip of paper had so much power?